Better mood
What a difference an afternoon can make.
Two things happened that have cheered me up.
The first - M.H. left me a link to Puppy Tale, which is fantastic and a pleasure to read. Thanks M.H.
The second was getting together, quite unexpectedly, with Princess. (For background on Princess, see here, here, and here) We caught up on things - her boyfriend, why my last relationship fell apart, our lives generally. I remembered tying her up for the first time, briefly, and smiled that I brought that into her life.
Princess was the first girl who introduced breath play into my life. Her arms were tied behind her, she was straddling me and riding me for all she was worth, and she looked down at me and said something like "choke me." At first I wasn't prepared to do it, but a few seconds later I was. And I liked it. And so did she.
Trouble is, it was addictive. I wanted to do it again, and some of the women I've met have been into it, others, less so. What I've realized lately is that I can't deny my nature. I want to do certain things. When I haven't been able to do them (as with certain exes) it created a hole in me that I filled with things that aren't so good for me - drinking, for example, tamps down the desires that I've got. So. To indulge myself, instead of the alternative of fucking the random women that I find just because they're beautiful and begging for it. It's my life, I'll use myself any way I want to.
Now, I'm not Deity, as I haven't taken these choices to their logical and fullest conclusion. But it is my fervent hope to do so someday.
Comments
You're welcome ;)
Posted by: M.H. | August 27, 2007 9:00 PM
Wow. i am really flattered to think reading my blog (which i have neglected terribly of late) could help brighten your day. i am so glad that it did. Tonight i shall be reading your blog and letting it do the same for me! Thanks for visiting Puppy Tales.
Hugs,
brooke
Posted by: brooke | August 28, 2007 1:21 PM