A Bad Man in a Bad Place

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I’ve seen several sex scandal tapes - this woman or that woman who made a private video and then it was “stolen” after which, well, you know the rest (fame and fortune ensues, mainly).

I’d like once, just once, one of the women that this happens to to let it happen knowingly and to embed, part of the way through, a message to the viewership that it’s ok to have sex, it’s a fine thing to enjoy it, that so what if she’s naked - it’s just a body, and yeah she’s having more fun than you.

I can’t think of any actress alive who could pull that off right now, but I live in hope. Turn the tables, you know? “As you sit home and jerk off to me, I’m here having wave after wave of orgasm and there’s not a damn thing wrong with what I’m doing, why are you off by yourself?”

If there are any celebrity actresses who want to do that and need a partner to shoot footage and fuck them at the same time, I’m here for you, incidentally.

UPDATE:  I should point out that this refers to celebrity tapes only, not the vengeful exboyfriend type.

Chet and I were talking about the fact that dating means, to us at least, living up to certain expectations. I’m not in a place right now where I feel I can meet those obligations, and as such I’ve been preemptively rejecting anyone who’s shown interest in me. The girl at the bar whose cousin told me to compliment her eyes and she’d go home with me - preemptively rejected. The cute girl I was talking to on the train - preemptively rejected.

This blog’s been through a lot of different iterations, starting with 25 year old manchild trying to find his way in the world and being afraid of women, through the late twenties of feeling out what it’s like to be a player, and then into S&M. I worry a lot about this site, both that my anonymity is not as well maintained as I’d like, and I wonder what the reaction of the women that I affectionally call “civilians” - those not in the blogging world - will be to finding out about this site. When the New Yorker found out about it, it sparked a fight between us.

I’ve become more shy, more reserved, and more internal lately. I’ve gotten a bit of therapy, but that’s a journey, not a step.

I don’t know what’s coming here, and I don’t know what I want. I just know that all life is change, and that’ll be reflected here if I pick writing back up.

If you came for the S&M, you’re likely to be disappointed. If you came for graphic gratuitous sex, there are plenty of other better blogs for that.

If you’re here to follow the story, or you’re interested, or for reasons that I haven’t yet figured out, well, welcome. I don’t know if I’m back or I’m just blogging my way through a mental sticking point, but I’ve started to feel the writing coming back, and I am nothing if not indulgent in my writing.

I hope you’ve been well while I’ve been away. Hope you’re doing well still.

This is amazing to me. Years ago I got into an argument with a handful of women about whether facials were erotic and whether women could like getting cum in the face.

Amateur self shots are very popular on the web and I thought it only fitting to add the amateurnut.com twist to self shots. We’ve compiled a large collection of self shot facial pics for all you facial lovers out there.

If they’re fake, ok, that’s one thing. But if they’re real, has there been a sudden shift in sexual tastes?

That’s what I’ve realized - I’ve been surfing a lot of amateur porn these days, partly looking for people I know and partly because I find it much much hotter than the stuff that LA puts out. I don’t want music in my porn, I don’t want outsized cocks and fake breasts, I want real people, or someone that looks like them, fucking in real ways.

The volume of amateur porn is staggering. I rarely see the same person twice, with the obvious exception of Heather Brooke which was, or perhaps wasn’t, amateur. Certainly isn’t now.

Two thoughts.

First, I’ve reached porn saturation. I’m sure this goes away but just the 2-d image of a naked woman or six women fucking ten guys or anything like that really isn’t doing it for me right now.

Second, I realized that I shouldn’t be surprised at the volume of amateur porn. Everyone wants to be sexy - it’s a biological imperative - fight, flight, f-sex. Not everyone wants to share that fact with the world, but everyone wants to be seen as sexy. Something for me to ponder.

Wow. Barney Frank has both gravitas and my respect for the following line:

“I try very hard never to break any law I voted for.” I can respect a politician like that.

After the jump, the Youtube video that I’m referring to. Take it for whatever it’s worth.

Much of the rest of it is about prostitution, and Bill Maher gives push-back on the concept that all prostitutes are part of the Human Trafficking horrors. I want a bumper sticker that says “she didn’t want to work 40 hours a week at KFC when she could spend 10 minutes blowing Colonel Sanders.” A fine point. Legalization would help to help normalize prices - driving them down, take sex workers out of “hiding,” and have positive public health consequences. Why is this still illegal?

As things stand, with a very small exception (the de minimis possibility of being arrested for high-end escort work) women are economically rewarded for illegal sex work. If women can apparently charge $5000/night for sex - how is that not a reward for breaking the law? This one has never made sense to me, perhaps some of you could shed light on it?

As George Carlin famously said: Selling is legal, Fucking is legal, why isn’t selling fucking legal?

Read the rest of this entry »

The Spitzer thing, much in the news lately, as reported by a former booking agent.

So, how common is this escorts plus rich-and-powerful men phenomenon? Really common. So common, that one aspiring model who worked for my agency told me she was leaving her midtown apartment, which was located near the luxury hotels, white shoe law firms and hedge funds of Manhattan, and moving downtown because she could not poke her head out her front door without running into a client. The aspiring model, by the way, started working as an escort because, as she put it, “I have sex with photographers and agents for free, just because they promise that they might get me a modeling job. At least with the escort agency clients I know for sure that I’ll get paid.”

[From Pajamas Media: I've Seen My Share of Spitzers: The View From an Escort Service]

I’m totally on a Gender kick today. I’ve always said that I’m as comfortable with a woman earning more than me than less than me. Donald Trump of all people has some things to say about this:

So, if your wife makes more money than you do, stop complaining and get over it. Realize that you’re a really lucky guy. And if you still can’t deal with it, then go out and get a better job.

[From Women with Big Salaries Can Depress Their Husbands - The Trump Blog]

This ought to give the Gender Theory kids something to munch on for awhile.

“Are women just like men?” asked Le Nouvel Observateur yesterday, which released extracts of the Study on Sexuality in France, a 600-page tome that brings together 12,000 in-depth interviews with people of all ages conducted during 2005-06.One of the biggest changes in recent years, according to the report, was that male and female sexual behaviour had become increasingly similar.[From French women 'are the sexual predators now' - Telegraph ]

At a tea party today, Sinclair and I (and others) had a conversation about why there are so few straight male sex bloggers.

Marcelle calls me a “Dating” blogger, not a sex blogger, and I think thats not wrong. With the exception of the Pickup community (such as Captain Jack) which is more focused on the logistics of getting a girl into bed than the actual fucking itself, it occurred to me that the only ones I could think of a few straight male bloggers - Lex, Deity, Axe, and a few others. Lots of bi guys, a huge boatload of women of all orientations, and some transgendered folks, I’m sure. Girl pointed out Monmouth, Hotaction and Easily Aroused.

Definitely wonder why there aren’t more of us - some theories: that men are in charge already, no reason for them to write. Men aren’t smart enough to blog. Men aren’t oriented towards sex. When men get in front of a computer they’d rather turn to Youporn than Blogger. I don’t know. Perhaps it’s that men writing about sex can be seen as churlish? Or perhaps it’s Dr. Helen’s focus - that men in Western society are opting out of many things, like marriage and fatherhood, because it’s all stick and no carrot for men. (Go to her site to read WAY more and figure out what I mean by this).I have many thoughts but little time, as ever. I just wanted to throw this to the group, accept that there aren’t many well known male sex bloggers, and wonder why.

Perhaps I’m fighting the patriarchy despite being “The Man.” (For those of you who are imagining and wanking along to this site, I’m a straight, white, 6′ tall man)

I’d also like to give a shout-out to Sinclair, who very sweetly asked, just as I was leaving, if I’d please post more. I’m going to try, but it’s complicated by the fact that I’m so busy living I haven’t had time to sit and reflect and write.

Hello, blog readers. I’m not dead, as you can see by my ongoing tweets. I’m not not getting action, The Writer’s got me drained of all fluids. We’ve done some of the, and I’m not making this up, hottest stuff I’ve ever done in my entire life together.

I just haven’t been in the mood to write about it. You know how it is - you like someone and then you lose the ability to think of them as just a sex object and blogfodder. The Writer’s like that. Lots of experiences with her, lots of salacious bits that I’m sure would titillate you. Anal sex. Lots of oral. Sex in as many positions as you can imagine. Multiple holes filled. Her hitting on girls. Me hitting on girls with her. Affection. Sweetness. Rubbing. Hugs. Petting. Lots of kissing.

But I just am not feeling the writing right now. I’m glad to see that Adriana is writing again, even if she’s not getting laid. Marcelle recently posted about sleeping with a coworker, and that story is very hot. Eros asks us to try to be a little bit political and Celebrate Bush. Which I did by telling The Writer to stop shaving between her legs. Until it grows out fully. Then we’re gonna trim that thing to find exactly the right shape.

But for me, for the moment, I can’t tell you what’s been happening lately because the writing magic just isn’t happening for me. It’s sad, but it happens. I think it’s writers block. Or maybe I’m just too depleted of fluids to be able to see straight and get work done. Either way, I hope to report back soon. And as always, I’m a shameless comment-whore, I love to see you saying things down in the comments there, even if it’s just “hello.”