March 31, 2004

The Buffalonian: is it weird

The Buffalonian: is it weird that i get a satisfaction from paying bills?
Bad Man: no. i get it too.
The Buffalonian: but you're a weirdo
Bad Man: true. but I'm sexy so it's ok.
The Buffalonian: haha, this is true. and i just got yet another weird satisfaction from flipping my calendar to April
Bad Man: yeah, you're a fruitcake, but it's ok.
The Buffalonian: i'm special, not a fruitcake.
Bad Man: you're a special little snowflake.
The Buffalonian: a frosted snowflake
Bad Man: is that like a frosted miniwheat? Is my lover also breakfast cereal?
The Buffalonian: i wouldn't mind being breakfast...to you
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Last night, I was exhausted.

Last night, I was exhausted. Too tired from the Buffalonian, SouthernBelle, and some things in my personal life, not to mention days of hard drinking, and a carb heavy dinner of pizza and falafel.

I passed out at 10.

Woke up to two voicemails:
The first was at 11:30pm.
"Hi Bad Man, it's NearVirgin. I was wondering if you wanted to meet me in the women's bathroom at my office. It's not the most beautiful setting in the world, but it'd be exciting nonetheless. If you want to meet me there, let me know."

The second was from Rokk Star Designer at around 12:30:
"Ok, dude. This is an exact quote. 'If you don't take me home, how are we ever going to get to be boyfriend and girlfriend?' She said that in all seriousness. And I ran."
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Old school sites that I

Old school sites that I used to read but stopped at some point, which I have recently been reminded of:

Good Shit - pictures of scantily (and not at all) clad women (making it NSFW) and links to interesting sites and news articles. A gem.

Attu sees all is more of the same. Less pictures of women this time around, but it's design is slicker.

Stile - the king of all E/N sites. I don't even know (still) what the F an E/N site is, but I know that Stile's always got weirdness going on. And he is ABSOLUTELY NOT SAFE FOR WORK (you have been warned).

Back to my life soon, and eventually I'll write that piece on pussification.
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March 30, 2004

I've been skimming some sex-bloggers

I've been skimming some sex-bloggers lately, since warbloggers are boring me, technobloggers are too dry, and sexblogging is fun.

Captive Heart is a bondage blog about a total D/s relationship. Again, not my thing so much, but they seem like they're so into it and so happy about things that I figure you might want to check it out. (NOTE: Some Not Safe For Work pictures on the site)

Eden who, although I ranted about her writing, still keeps a good blog (which I keep reading in hopes that it will go back to its former glory) keeps an excellent sex-blogger blogroll. I don't think I'm a sex-blogger, though. I read through them and their focus is on the sex, the fucking, the in and out, the bondage, the "then my bit fit with his/her bit in this way and wheeeeelagh did I have an orgasm from hell" thing.

I don't know how I'd classify this place. PickupBlogging? Dateblogger? Dunno.

I've also liked Sweetness Follows for awhile. Mike and Michelle seem so happy with their scenario. I like the fact that pictures of them haven't surfaced, it addes to the eroticism of their being anyone at all, maybe the couple on the train in front of me, maybe those two in the back at the bar, maybe anyone.

Sir Italian is my inspiration for this. I made a New Years Resolution (quietly, to myself) to have more threesomes this year. So far, I've just been lying the groundwork (anyone interested??) but I defer to Sir when it comes to that sort of thing, and have been watching his progress and learning from what he's done.

There'll be more. I've read a lot of these things over the last six to eight months.

Do you have suggestions of what I should read? Leave 'em in the comments.
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March 29, 2004

I never really got the

I never really got the whole "S&M" scene.

Of course, I've never taken part in it, either.

Sure, I've had my share (ok, more than my share) of moments where I tied a woman to herself, and had my way with her. Tying hands to ankles, tying hands together, blindfolding, placing headphones, altering her state.

I never got the joy of being on bottom, though. I don't like to be tied up, and I am very reticent about relinquishing the upper hand in the bedroom.

What's interesting to me is reading a bit of Mistress Matisse's blog. It's totally out of the realm of the things I'd do, but it's interesting to see what others would.

For example - the idea of paying a woman to spank me leaves me cold. For two reasons. First - paying a woman to play with me? That, ummm, freaks me out a lot. Second - Spanking me? That doesn't sound like much fun. (and then apologizing for the whole thing in her comments? Good lord...)

That aside, she's interesting to read, I just discovered her. Go check her out.
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SouthernBelle: okay poodle, gimmie a

SouthernBelle: okay poodle, gimmie a holla to let me know what's up.
Bad Man: poodle? puppy I can live with, poodle, though?
SouthernBelle: and you are a puppy...
SouthernBelle: but poodles have curly hair and are attention starved
Bad Man: oy
Bad Man: so much for being a cool dog like a bulldog or bullmastiff.
Bad Man: *sigh*
SouthernBelle: maybe one day
Bad Man: if anybody needs me, I'll be off licking my balls.
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1) I find a woman

1) I find a woman in sweats and a tank top sexier in a lot of instances than I find a woman in lingerie, or a little black dress. A good pair of jeans beats a business suit, and boots and a miniskirt (but only on the right pair of legs) can make me weak. But seriously, the sweats and a tank top combo is sexy because it's a comfortable woman. I like women who are comfortable. Don't front, don't put on a half pound of make-up. I'd rather play with the "uglier" woman who is sexy and comfortable with herself than the more beautiful one who is uptight and knows that she gets by on her looks, and thus places a great deal of value on them. Sweats and a tank top. Sexy. Preferably a tank top which is well work, strappy, the fabric clings just so...

2) Ju - I will spread the word on about women wanting to be lead. And yes, I find that women, particularly powerful women, become soft and feminine and kittenish when they're taken in hand and know that the man that they're with is a man, not some pussified he-bitch. I also use the word kittenish because I know that most cats, from tigers down to tabby, will go limp if you grab them by the scruff of their neck, and the women I know (well, the ones I've played with, with one recent exception) get feminine and kittenish and wet if I grab the hair right above the nape of their neck and pull. Their lips part, they moan softly, and I can easily kiss them because their mouths are already open. So, yes, I think all women have a kittenish side. Maybe not the real serious bedroom dominant ones, but I find those are the wallflowers during the day, and I'm not usually attracted to them. I like beautiful women who are powerful outside the bedroom, and sexy and feminine inside it. And who, when the right things happen, let their guard down and let me take control, doing what I want, how I want it. And if, and this is crucial ladies, so pay attention - if she wants something, she'll freakin' tell me, or ask me, or guide me, and not just mope when I don't give her the anal she wanted because I didn't know that that's what she was in the mood for. SPEAK UP. If you like me enough to let me stick my cock in your mouth and you swallow my cum, I think you could at least have the confidence to say "hey, I want you to rub my clit while you fuck my ass and stick your thumb in my mouth, too."

3) I've got my own "Dante" now. Eden has a lover, a friend, and a guy who she sees sporadically who knows all about her life, who she is comfortable with, who she shares her escapades with. I have one too. SouthernBelle. It's a pretty great situation. We each have our Liberals - hers is a rock star, mine's the Liberal. She actually refers to her lost love by the Liberal's name. Reminds me of the line in the Three Amigos... "You know, we all have an El Guapo to face in our lives. For some, shyness may be their El Guapo. For others, lack of education is El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous guy who wants to kill us. But sure as my name is Lucky Day, I know the people of Santo Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo...who happens to be the actual El Guapo."

4) Men, if you didn't believe me before, go read the comments to over here. LEARN TO FUCK. (Ok, Sexkitten and Lili? Is that enough word spreading besides telling my guy friends?) Ladies - if you want to give me notes on tips for guys, I will compile them for a later post. Email me at badmanbadplace@yahoo.com

5) I accept pictures of women's breasts with the words "Bad Man" written on them, or on a piece of paper with them. Also butts. Also fully nude.

6) Spent a languorous evening fucking the Buffalonian on Saturday and then into Sunday morning. Every time we tried to leave the bed, we ended up fucking again. Sadly, by the time we got to brunch, many fuckings later, I was so out of it that I nearly passed out and was a lousy convesationalist.

7) I have pigs. When I say I have pigs, I mean that I have tiny little plastic pigs that are around a half inch long. I give them away. I'm going to try using them as either a reward to pretty girls I talk to, or use them as a prop to girls I approach. I've given them to a lot of friends, and they've squealed with glee. Yes, glee. I said glee. Who says that? I bought 65 pigs, and I'm down to 40. The next 20, at least, must go to girls I don't know as of this writing. I'll report on that.

8) I saw The Freshman over the weekend. She's 23 now, the same age as the Buffalonian. She's still so pretty, with lips that beg to be kissed. But not by me.

9) I have an email address now and I like getting mail and comments - so feel free to contact me at badmanbadplace@gmail.com
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March 28, 2004

Two notes for you, my

Two notes for you, my gentle readers (yeah, like you're gentle...) after this evening's festivities.

One for the ladies, one for the gents.

Ladies - a good pickup line when you're hitting on me in a bar is not "so which one of these is your girlfriend?" Especially when I've been sitting alone for a few minutes. Try "hello."

Gentlemen - this is a very serious PSA from my friends, two of whom I spoke to tonight, others of whom I've spoken to previously. LEARN TO FUCK. Get a book. Get two books. Buy the Kama Sutra. Buy the idiot's guide to sex. Sex for dummies. But David Shade's manual (no, seriously, buy it...) Do some goddamned thing. My girl-friends are starting to get laid again (praise be unto Spring) but now their complaint is that ya'll suck in bed. Even if it's the first night together, it's ok to slow down and ask what feels good. DO NOT JUST DO THE JACKHAMMER THRUSTING BANG BANG BANG thing. (I have this from several very sexy women...) So - if you want to sleep with attractive women, learn how the fuck to do it properly. Otherwise, I'm liable to hear about it, and that'll be mad embarassing to you.
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Also note that I cold approached a girl in my bar tonight. She sat next to me, and I hit on her. Because, you know, why not?
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March 27, 2004

Actual conversation I just had

Actual conversation I just had in my head:

Self: Should I take an adult education course over a three day weekend on meeting women and picking them up in places like clubs and bars, which I've never been able to do, or on the street?

Self replies: Umm, might conflict with SouthernBelle on Friday and Buffalonian on Saturday, don't you think?

Self: Umm... good point... what the fuck was I thinking?
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March 26, 2004

So here's a complicated equation:

So here's a complicated equation:

I now have SouthernBelle on Fridays and the Buffalonian on Saturdays.

Which means that I either have to start squeezing women in between, or on weekdays.

Interesting.

TaeKwanDo, for example is coming on Saturday at 3:30. ;)
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The Liberal emailed me about

The Liberal emailed me about some trouble she's having, and reiterated her position that she's not cut out for life in New York City.

Two notes:

1) I didn't shake at the email (yay for GFTOW)
2) I'm marginally sad that my mental plan when she left, that I'd do some self improvement and she'd be back, won't happen.
3) It's not over until we're all dead.
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March 25, 2004

Last night Rokk Star Designer

Last night Rokk Star Designer (RSD) and I got together for dinner. I needed a break from women (something about "having a life other than my dating life" and something about waking up from a nightmare with the words "oh christ now I won't ever get married" (weird, eh?) on my mind) and I needed a break from work, and RSD is the opposite of both. Built like a combination of a brick shithouse and a punk rocker, wearing the same Ford t-shirt he put on on Sunday, and being utterly unaffiliated with the law made him an optimal choice. Plus, he was on Instant Message when I got peckish at 8.

Of course, the trouble with not having a feminine influence is that you end up with two guys saying "I don't give a fuck what we eat, I'm just fucking hungry."

We went to the ATM around the corner from my apartment. RSD's main criteria for dinner was "there's gotta be hot chicks there, I've been in front of my computer too long." While I was trying to stay away from women, I can always do with eye candy. Women are easy on the eyes. At least, the hotties in my neighborhood are.

But I couldn't think of where to go. Cafe Gitane is over. B Bar used to be models and queers and is now just queers. Coffee Shop is too far, too dark, and has too much attitude.

We did the only thing we could do.

"Dude" I grunted "you want a place with chicks?"
"Yeah" he grunted back.
"I don't have a fucking clue."
We grunted a bit more.
I also noticed a cute blonde on her cell just outside the bank. "Why don't we ask her?"
"Word."
"I should ask her?" He just sort of looked at me when I made that proposal.
So I did that single thing that makes me want to puke on my shoes, which is - I cold approached a hot chick on the street and totally broke her state.

"Excuse me, Miss." I got her attention. "Where should we go for dinner?"
She looked surprised that we'd dare talk to her. Then again, this is New York, and that isn't really done. (Or so I'm told...)
"What are you looking for?"
"Food. We're hungry and can't pick a place."
We fluff talked for about three minutes, she suggested three places then foisted us on her less cute and more annoying friend. They walked the opposite direction, and we went to an entirely different place.

Still - a cold approach of a hot blonde on a street corner is a good start. Even if I don't really like blondes that much.

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March 23, 2004

Last night was quiet -

Last night was quiet - I went to my bar for a quick drink and to catch up on some reading. Yes, I read in bars. I live in the East Village next door to a noisy college student. It's easier to tune out the whole bar than it is to tune him and his stoner friends out.

While I was in the bar, SouthernBelle called, drunk, from Florida.

"Did you get me tickets to Prince?"
"I have no idea, I had a coworker trying."
"I want to go to Prince."
"So buy yourself a ticket. I have no idea if I got them or not." She made whining noises. "Don't whine, I don't do this. This is why I don't get girls gifts."
"But it's Priiiiince"
"Yeah. Get yourself a ticket."
"oooh! Now I'm getting molested by the bride to be." She's in Florida visiting a childhood friend for a weeklong wedding celebration. "I've been making out with her all day."
"You're just a little lesbian party this week, aintcha? You never invite me out when you're having the lesbian fun, I'm so jealous." She'd called me on Saturday night while I waited for the Buffalonian to tell me she was drunk and making out with the bartenders at Coyote Ugly.
She made thhpting noises. "I'll try to get my own tickets."
"Cool. Worst case scenario, we'll sell them on eBay and you can buy me dinner with the money you make."
"Jerk."
"You love it."
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March 22, 2004

Maccers gives women advice on

Maccers gives women advice on sleeping with married men.

I never sleep with a married man unless I actually want something back in return, often specific items ⤳ I⤁m a 7 in Blahniks, you know ⤳ and I⤁d encourage other ladies to think about this when cursorily reviewing their bank statements as well. Have you seen something you particularly want ⤳ handbag, shoes, mini break to Bora Bora? And is there someone you can fuck to get it? Not everything will actually require you to actually sleep with them, you know and sometimes I would even highly recommend never putting out. Especially if what you want is akin to blackmail. You know men love the chase. Make him hire you or something. Then you gracefully decline to sleep with him for ⤦legal reasons. After all you only ever have his best interests at heart.

Via Gawker

Discuss.
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What I like best about

What I like best about Pussy Ranch isn't that she's a stripper. Or that she's hot. It's that she's a damn good writer.

Ditto Belle

Of course, that sounds like saying I read Playboy for the Articles (I don't, I read Blogs instead) but it's not. They've both got more writing talent than most of the hacks that come out of the Iowa circuit and the New School and NYU and all the other writer chop shops. Maybe it's that they're real, who knows.

But I like it.

Don't care about the "who she is" controversy about Belle, frankly. I just like the writing. Which is why I used to like the Dirty Whore, but don't anymore (it used to be good writing and sex, now it's all dental pain and relationships, and the writing isn't what I want to read). I'm sure she's got writing talent, but the novelty of reading about her being a sexual woman wore off, and now I find she's not as engaging a writer as Belle or Diablo.

I still like Naked Loft Party even though I think his writing borders on being way the hell over the top and vaguely pedantic. The literary references are way too much for me, thanks. If I want to read Dostoyevsky, I will. Instead it sounds like a Yalie cranked up on Coke, who is relating this really great story to his Yalie pals, and who hopes that someday a publisher will recognize the genius of writing about orgies in New York City at the turn of the new millennium. I mean, if we couch it in terms of War and Peace, it's literature, not smut. Somehow, though, he's still got a voice I like to listen to. Maybe it's the reverberating voices of the ladies in his life that I like listening to, I'm not sure.

I'm a sucker for good writing.
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Ok, so I admit, I

Ok, so I admit, I use online dating services. Two reasons.

1) Approach is difficult, and the end result isn't supposed to be the approach, it's supposed to be meeting someone new and maybe getting physical with them.

2) I have really good success online while I work at my job 60-80 hours a week.

Newest site:

Vanity Date - Survival of the Prettiest.

Mind you - I'm not pretty, but I'm handsome (see post below about meeting girls because I'm good looking) and it's a site where you have to be voted in by the current members. It's like a reverse Friendster. Since I've been on, I've got to say, there are a few SHBs on there, but it's slim pickin's, since it's a self-selecting crowd.

It's worth checking out if you think you're hot shit and good looking.
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Said SouthernBelle - "You're a

Said SouthernBelle - "You're a puppy."
"A puppy?"
"Yeah. You're cute and fun, but you're still a dog."
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March 21, 2004

I found out over brunch

I found out over brunch that the Buffalonian was one of the hostesses at a club I went to a few times. I probably saw here there, in that atmosphere, since the times she was working and the times I went, coincide. I would never in a million years have hit on her there. Too intimidating. But then... we fucked three times this morning, and I have no idea why I think that.

In bed with her last night, I asked "what's the worst pickup line anyone's ever used on you?" I've already taught her that the universal opener is "Hi."

She thinks about it for a few minutes.

"Some guy walked up to me, he was wearing this really shiny shirt, and he looked sorta like Quentin Tarantino. He looked at me and started saying that he wanted to wrap me up in bubble tape."
"And that you looked like his little sister?"
"Yeah! And he wanted to put me in his pocket."
"And take you with him to LA?"
"Yeah!!" I laughed. "It seemed like he'd rehearsed that line over and over before he used it."
"I bet he did" I chuckled. "So what'd you say?"
"I was with my roommate. We shut him down pretty quick. What's the best line you ever used? Besides 'Hi'."

I told her the story PunkRockGirl (AKA Jarvis) and the first night I took her home.


"I went out one night years ago with the distinct plan of trying to just be direct. I'd met a girl the night before, and she'd surprised me by not leaving with me, after we'd kissed in the bar. The next night, we were at a show together, and we were each sitting on barstools watching a friend of mine's band. I tapped her on the shoulder and yelled:

"You surprised me last night"

"Really? Why?"

"I thought you were going to come home with me."

Her eyes got big. "What made you think that?"

"Because it would have been good for you."

"Really" she deadpanned.

"Yeah. So tonight, I'm taking you home, and I'm going to fuck you until you beg me to stop."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I'm going to take you home tonight and fuck you silly."

"Are you kidding?"

"No. We're leaving when this set is over."

And we did and I did."

"Woah."
"Yeah, it worked. You know that look a dog gets when you pick up its dish, and you're about to give it some kibbles and it starts drooling?"
"Yeah..."
"Yeah, she got that look. Like she was a little doggie and I was holding her dinner bowl."
"Wow."
"Yeah. Good times. good times."

Then we made out some more. The Buffalonian is a little minx, I like it.
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March 18, 2004

When taking home blowjob girl

When taking home blowjob girl on Sunday night, she said to me "I should let you know, I've recently started seeing someone."

I responded the only way I could.

"So? I'm seeing four other women." And then I walked her back to my place.
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The Buffalonian called at 9:30

The Buffalonian called at 9:30 to see if she could come over.

"Are you calling me to come over?"
"No, I wouldn't want to invite myself."
"Ah. What if I invited you?"
"I could come over if you want."
"Ok. Want to come over?"
"Do you want me to?"
"I do."
"What time?" and we set a time.

She was drunk, as it was St. Patrick's day, and she got to my place at 10:15. We kissed in the door, and segue'd straight to the bed.

She was wearing a green shirt that said "kiss me, I'm Irish"
"A red headed midget gave this to me" she explained.
"I should take it off of you. I don't want some other guy marking up my territory."
"Yeah." Off it came.

As did the rest of her clothing.

I lit some candles, and we had sex a few times, a shocking perfect fit. Her body molded to mine like few I'd ever felt before. The candles were blown out, and she left at seven in the morning.

She wants to come over again on Saturday night, after she spends time away with her mom.

While she was there, LAWriterChick called.

"Why don't you ever call my friend?" was the first thing out of her mouth. I'd gone on one date with her friend, a fairly cute woman with way too little experience and eyes way too wide when facing me.
"I can't talk now, I'm in bed" I replied.
"Ok. Call me. Love you. Mean it" she said. I think I'd hate LA.

I got back into the bed with the Buffalonian, and she asked who it was. "A girl asking why I don't take her friend out more. Wages of sin."
"How many women have you been with?"
"More than five, less than a thousand."
"Jesus. I'm just one of a bunch, huh?"
"No, you've got the sweetest ass I've ever seen. I like that. You've got a sweeter ass than a stripper I once dated."
"Holy crap. You've been to the doctor since you dated her, right?"
"Many times. I'm clean, how about you?"
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March 16, 2004

Something weird about saying "this

Something weird about saying "this date felt" anything "than the last five."

There will be a second date with this girl.

but anyway-- girlhuntingbloggergeekwannabe.  we will hang again--

And the photo session is apparently on.
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The date went badly, I

The date went badly, I was uncomfortable, feeling pinched. I can barely describe it. I was off my game. She was interesting - high intensity, a magazine editor, Jewish. First Jewish girl I've been out with in the longest time. The date felt more difficult than the last five.

At the end of the night, I apologized to her. She's a pro-photographer, too, and I'd promised her over email that we'd make out on film.

My apology was for not facilitating that.

"I'm sorry that I didn't make out with you on film" I told her.
"That's ok, this was just the preliminary round."
"Preliminary? You want to see me again?"
"I do." I kissed her for the first time. And second. Through the fifth.
"Ok." Another kiss. I walked her to a cab.
"Next time, I'll bring my camera equipment. You'll have to sign a release form."
"I can do that."
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March 15, 2004

Email from last night's girl:

Email from last night's girl:

First, she talked about politics for awhile. Then -

On another note, you're hot and totally alarming.  I have no idea what I think of you and that makes me want to see you even more.
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And then I got email

And then I got email from Saturday night. Saturday night, I got a ilttle more drunk than I'd expected to, and ended up making out in a ladies room at this woman's office. She had to pee, and we were right by her work, so in we went. I followed her into the bathroom because I'm that kinda guy. When she was done, we made out, I picked her up and basically held her up with my legs (go working out!!) and made out with her against the wall.

I emailed her today asking if she was ok, if her hangover had abated.

Don't worry about my drunk hours. My life needs more of them. Although a colleague working on a deadline this weekend was in the men's room just next to the women's room when we were there and that person made the effort of mentioning that he "heard" me Saturday night. Let's hope I don't need to find another place of employment out of embarrassment.
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On instant message just now,

On instant message just now, SB said -

thought about you...just read a quote..."I've often wished I had the time to cultivate modesty. But I am too busy thinking about myself."
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Rob commented over in the

Rob commented over in the post before this one about my "jedi powers" and getting a "blowjob on command."

Before I go (excuse the pun) tooting my own horn, a few bits of background.

I was talking to Dr. Vital about this last night after the blowjob girl left. I've been getting picked up, you see, not picking girls up. I've got a thing about me that makes me look at once non-threatening and charming, while overtly sexual. I've cultivated it over the years. Basically put - I've got a look.

I've just got a quiet confidence about me that if I meet a girl and I like her, I'm going to fuck her, and if it's not that night, it's going to be the night after or the night after that. Unless she's a virgin.

But Dr. Vital made an important point over IM. He's been around since right before the Cuban, he's the one who introduced me, during a rooftop party, to the whole idea that SS was even out there.

If you look in the sidebar, you'll see two things - the first is the GFTOW counter, currently at five. This is good, but it reflects five women, the Jaguar, an ex, Southern Belle, the Buffalonian, and another woman who I haven't nicknamed, all of whom picked me. Yes, I flirted with them. Yes, I called them on their shit and set up a frame where it looked like they were picking me up and asking me on a date.

But they all picked me. Which means, in layman's terms, that i've been relying, at least in part, on my looks.

Which is a bad thing, because looks fade. And what's interesting is that I'm still afraid to approach women. Can you imagine?

Well, I'm not sure I'm afraid, but I haven't done so.

I can get laid three times in a row, capped on either side by blowjobs, each on successive days, each by a different woman. And I'm still intimidated to walk up to a random girl and just say hi.

I can go from meeting to doggie dinner bowl in an hour, to sex in three to four hours, and I can't say hi to strangers. I can flirt with the help (waitresses, sales girls, whatever) but I can't walk up to a girl on the street.

Since that's my weakness (and it served me really badly when I saw an ultra-HB on the street walking a totally cute dog, making eye contact and giving IOIs yesterday at around seven when I was bored and wanted her number) I need to, and have promised Dr. Vital that I would, work on it. That's why under the GFTOW thing there is the "Cold Approach" section.

I may have to move this off of blogger and onto Typepad or something, so I can have categories, to describe the approaches, the dates, the lays, what have you.

Now, my game is tight for two reasons, one of which you can replicate, one you can't.

The replicable one is that I'm confident as hell. Saturday night saw me in the ladies room at this girl's office, lifting her up bodily and putting her on the sink and making out with her there. Because I knew she wanted it, and I was willing to risk getting smacked. After she started grinding with me and demanded we go back to my place, it became obvious it was the right choice.

The other half is my looks.

I'm kinda preppy/kinda cool. I've been described as having the face of an angel, specifically, looking a lot like the angel in Caravaggio's paintings, or like his Cupid. Well, my face does. (Warning that picture is a naked picture of a guy. But it's art, so you know, deal with it.)

I've got the face of an angel, but the desires and mouth of a devil. That's not original, and that's what one of my friends in college used to say. So if my results aren't replicable, it may be that.

All I know is that the more of a player I am, the more I get laid, the more I make clear to women and the universe that I'm a player, the more women smell something on me and want a piece of the action. The more relaxed I get with myself, the more comfortable I get, the better I do and the more I work out the more comfortable I am with my body and the stronger I am, and women seem to react well to the confidence and comfort, not the big bulky body. I don't have a big bulky body. I'm 6'0 and 145lbs. Almost all muscle, but I'm hairy, and kinda scrawny. But I'm confident as can be. And that is what seems to make all the difference.
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It's becoming almost statistical. Met

It's becoming almost statistical. Met woman in bar, took her home within a few hours, had her in my bed, giving me a blowjob. Didn't want to have sex, which was fine. Three in a row was plenty for me, a fourth would have been nice, but I can live without. This one was nice, physically big (5'11) and reminded me of a woman from my past, only more attractive. Not a bad thing.

For those in the "Seduction" community who are reading this, we spent most of the time with _me_ talking about politics and why I think that the Iraq war was a good thing. And I'm pretty sure that I forgot deoderant. Why do I tell you this? Because there was no "patterning", no NLP, I didn't "prove my value," I didn't "show alphaness" (ok, a little bit, since it was my bar and the people all knew me) and I didn't "blow out" any other guys. Not that I'm saying anything's wrong with these things, but I'm beginning to think that I've figured out that the deep dark secret about "Seduction" is that it's...

an excellent excuse to talk to women whom you'd otherwise not talk to for whatever reason.

Most of Seduction is the so-called "inner-game." Now - I've had four successful nights in a row, four different girls, three of which agreed to be Fuckbuddies, and one of which wants to have an incredible amount of sex if she physically can. Before I got my "inner game" sorted, more thanks to Dr. Vital and Mark than anything else, I would have been a mess. Now I know it's basically fait accomplis that I'm going to take home any woman that I want to, either on the first date or the second. I have no trouble waiting for a second date, because I spend the interim time building anticipation.

I've got more thoughts on this but I'm a little tired to share them at the moment.

Now - I acknowledge, I'm not ugly. But that's because I know what my good features are and I work those pretty hard.

And the more women I tell I'm a player, the more they want a piece of the action.
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March 14, 2004

And another. I promised I

And another. I promised I wouldn't let anyone know about this. But yes, another.

So yes, GFTOW: 5.
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March 13, 2004

Last night was possibly the

Last night was possibly the oddest date I've been on in years.

The woman without a nickname met me at my place at 9. I felt off my game, and when she got here, I got a closed mouth kiss on the lips.

We went upstairs, talked a bit, then went and rented a DVD. Stopped by my bar on the way home, had a few drinks, and things got more uncomfortable. She revealed that she wasn't comfortable with sleeping with a guy sleeping with a bunch of women at the same time, and that she'd slept with her last guy a month ago. I didn't tell her that I'd slept with my last woman around 12 hours earlier. Bad thing? Maybe.

We went back to my place where we got comfortable in the bed, she with her head on my chest and me with the laptop in my lap, and she proceeded to fall asleep.

As the movie ended, she started snoring. She rolled over a bit, and hit me in the head with her arm.

It was about this time that I started questioning whether I had made the right choice of woman here.

At three in the morning, my next door neighbors started playing a videogame, which woke me up. And it woke her up as well.

She was shocked to awaken in her clothing, shocked that she'd slept through the movie, and frisky. Frisky? She wanted to make out. And soon after we started making out, to fuck.

Which we did. Quite well. She's got quite a body, and a big ol' latin sized ass (which is a shock, to me, on a white girl) which I proceeded to have a good deal of fun with. She was responsive and fun and kittenish. She didn't have any hangups at all, just wanted me to keep fucking her.

After we'd finished our first round at 4:45, the neighbors were still being loud. So I proposed that we fuck again, only this time, we be louder. We did that, too. And finally, at six, both we and they were quiet.

So we slept until 9, and got up briefly, went at it again, and passed out again briefly. We went and had some brunch, came home for another nap, and I sent her on her way.

I'll see her again. She was fun.

GFTOW: 4. The Liberal still hurts, but I have trouble seeing her in my head. She came up in my mind while I was fucking this one last night, but what can you do.
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March 12, 2004

Someone suggests that Handjobs are

Someone suggests that Handjobs are on the decline.

From personal experience with the Virgin, the Kuwaiti Princess, and the Liberal, I must disagree. Personally, I will also note that I disagree with the premise - after fucking the Liberal for about two months, we had a particularly hot session where the extent of what I got out of it was a handjob, and it was a damn fine one to boot. So, no, don't despair, the handjob is not gone or going anywhere soon.
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I got home from work

I got home from work at nine to meet SouthernBelle, who now has a standing weekly invitation. She's gotten herself sick (kidney infection!!) and is on antibiotics. I'd proposed going to a movie, but since I spent the night before up until 3am with the unnicknamed buffalonian, and the night before that drinking with the hot bartender, I was a little too beat to even make it to a movie.

What's interesting is that neither she nor I are in a place to have anything serious with anybody, but we're incredibly comfortable. We can fuck and lie around and talk and give each other advice and play and it's great. I'm not jealous of the men she wants to date (since they're usually chumps too afraid to smooch her (she's an actress, and kinda hot)) and she's not intimidated by the other women I date, since she's not trying to get me to fall in love with her. It's a good and very comfortable situation.

When I got home, there was a package waiting for me from the Liberal. Freaked me out a little. She had sent me back the Sex and the City DVDs I'd loaned her. And inside was a postcard, the first contact in around a month, saying that she hoped all was well, and about how happy she was where she was and so forth.

My breath got a little short, and to her everlasting credit, SouthernBelle said "That's from the Liberal? You're still in love with her, aren't you?"
"I am."
"That must hurt. I'm sorry. Come here." And then she kissed me. It was sweet and tender and friendly and like a best friend.

We fell asleep without fucking, I think I was in the middle of a sentence, around midnight. She fell asleep in all of her clothes, apparently as exhausted as I was.

When we woke up, I had to be uptown by 9:15, and it was 8. I did some math in my head, and decided we had time for a quickie. We had a short little session, pleasantly capped by a simultaneous orgasm, at which point we disengaged, she scrambled to get dressed, and I scrambled to get showered.

---
I got this email from Buffalonian just now, whom I am seeing this evening at 9:

Subject: Hi.

Body: looking forward to our "make-out session"
---
I think that I don't have much trouble attracting women. David D said that the rest of the world opens up once you've got this area of your life handled. I think I finally do. The Liberal will continue to hurt, the Jaguar will continue to stalk, and I will continue to live and thrive.
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March 11, 2004

Last night I went on

Last night I went on another friendster date. It's easy enough, since I keep getting asked out by these women, to set up a date and see what will happen.

We went to the coffee place I normally go to, and then to the bar I normally go to. At some point, she said something or other, and I can't remember what, and so I kissed her.

We made out so much that a woman who had been dancing like a stripper for most of the night tapped us on the shoulder and said "get a room." We laughed.

I used the 1 to 10 on the inner arm technique on her, and showed her how to get good feelings out of it. She's skeptical, but was willing to try.

I also told her that she was on a scale of 1 to 10 with me. I placed her at an 8, then an 8.5, then a 9. She asked what she could do to become a ten, I told her to be creative.

At around 1, we decided it was time to leave the bar. I finished my drink, and she couldn't finish hers.
"I can finish that, if you'd like" I told her.
"You don't want to do that, if you do, I'm liable to take advantage of you" she replied.
I, of course, finished the drink.

We left to get hot dogs around the corner, and then I asked her to come back to my place to give me a good night kiss. She agreed, despite her four inch heels, to walk the four blocks and one avenue to my place.

Back to my place, where rather than stopping in the vestibule as I have lately with other women, I just took her by the hand and led her up to my apartment as if that's what was on the agenda the whole time. No stopping to talk or think about it, just one smooth motion up the stairs.

Upstairs, we made out some more, and ended up on the bed. I stripped her naked, and looked her up and down, and at some point, she got shy. She covered her nakedness with her hands, apparently embarassed that I was looking at her like that.

A shame, she's got a sexy body. Which I told her, and she relaxed a little, and let herself go.

We made out some more, and she went down on me, and finally, we went to sleep.

This morning at 7:30, she got up, got dressed, and I let her out. She's instant messaging me now. She'll be back.

I'll have to think of a nickname for her.
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March 10, 2004

I got dumped last night

I got dumped last night by a woman on a second date. First date was dinner, makeout and a blowjob, followed by kicking me out.

Last night was straight to her Upper East Side place, after an important meeting. We were talking, and she knows the MILF that I'm going to be with at the end of the month, and the conversation turned to that and whether my seeing her would interfere with the MILFs plans on me.

After a little discussion, she asked how many people I was seeing. I asked her if she wanted numbers or names or what. I told her about the actress, the virgin, and my fuckbuddy. And that I have a date tonight with the Buffalonian. (I need a better name for her...)

She told me that she didn't want to just be a face in the crowd, she didn't do sharing, she was too greedy. I told her that was fine, and we made out for an hour more, and then I left.
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March 9, 2004

Remember how I said that

Remember how I said that I thought I was getting over the liberal? Well, I saw her profile on Friendster. She updated her picture today. She looks even more beautiful. She took down the picture I took of her at my birthday party and added two more, one in a bathing suit (nice cleavage) and one where she looks stunning.

*sigh*

I saw it and I began to shake the way I used to shake over The Cuban.

My heart started racing.

And now I've broken out in a cold sweat.

Wow.

Seven more on the GFTOW. What if THAT doesn't work?
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I've been working on my

I've been working on my NLP and hypnosis skills with the women I go out with, and with my friends.

I've been using that 1 to 10 dial a lot. (Can you remember your last really intense amazing orgasm? Ok, imagine that was a 10 on a sliding scale from one to ten, with one (touch her inner wrist) being boring daily life and ten (touch her inner elbow) being your peak orgasm. And it's a sliding scale... (slide your finger up her arm from 1 to 10) Now, what if I could set it so that what you think is 10 right now (touch inner elbow) down to where you think 1 is (touch wrist) and we could dial it up even higher, so your new one is ten and your old ten is a hundred? (Slide up doing that...) The good ones will get shivers, or will get a sly smile or some such...)

I've been working on calibrating, and teaching my friends about themselves.

Last night, the Biter asked how I get people to trust me so quickly. To like me so fast. To listen and be pursuaded so easily. I have no idea. I just studied this and apply it organically. And then she asked me for some help with her mind, which I gave her in a very few minutes, and then she said "I'm so not going to tell you that that worked as well as it feels like it did, because then your ego would be insufferable, and it's already too big as it is."
"My ego is a force of nature, you can't fight it. It'll fill any room I enter. It's not a big deal."
"That's true" she said, before she kissed me on the lips, and flitted off into the night.
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March 8, 2004

Had drinks with the lovely

Had drinks with the lovely TexasTrustFund last night. I like her, although she's not quite a New Yorker when it comes to the speed with which her mind works.

The conversation turned inevitably to sex, since it's me who was talking to her, and she's got my favorite body shape - tall leggy dark haired woman with interesting eyes and a nice smile, pretty lips, and some curves on her ass and her breasts. She was once shaped like a model, when we met four years ago, and I thought I'd break her if I screwed her, so I didn't bother trying.

Now she's fresh out of a sexless relationship and horny as hell, and I'm... well... I'm Bad Man.

She and I were talking about how men hit on women. I've taken to the direct method. If a woman flirts with me, I get a serious look, call her out on it, and accept that she's asking me on a date. But I'm always direct. She looked at me thoughtfully for a bit after I told her that.

"Yeah, I had a guy say to me the other day 'I want you to give me a blowjob tonight'" she reported.
"That's direct. Did you?"
"No. I sort of laughed at him."
"That night."
"Yeah. But then a week later, I saw him, and I was like 'I'm going to give you a blowjob, but you've got to fuck me the way I want to be fucked.'"
"How'd that work out for you?"
"It was awesome."
"You like giving blowjobs, don't you." This wasn't a question, this was a statement.
"I do. I mean, they're just release, you know? He needs a release and it's fun for me."
"Good. You should give me a blowjob." I paused. I know her boyfriend (now ex, sorta) and I wasn't actually trying to get her to blow me. "Kidding. I'm kidding." And I was.
"How about this - if you go for a long time without sex, I'll give you a blowjob."
"Like, a long time for anyone, or a long time for me?"
"A long time."
"So like, two days?" She laughed. "A week?"
She counterproposed "A month."
"No wonder you're offering - never gonna happen."
"I know, that's why it's easy to offer." I laughed.
"I want that in writing" I told her. She agreed. "I'm going to hold you to this if I ever have a dry spell again."
"Good."
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March 6, 2004

Southern Belle came over for

Southern Belle came over for a date last night. The date was "let's go to the video store, rent a dvd, get some dinner, and watch the DVD at my place." Suffice it to say that we had a good time. We've now got, theoretically, a standing Friday appointment every other week.

Neither of us is serious about the other, but we've got good physical chemistry. It's good.

GFTOW: 3. The Liberal fades in my mind.

Some interesting notes.

1) She and I immediately fell into a comfort zone of not-dating not-friends but something else. Not just sex, though. Hard to explain. All the good parts about a relationship without the bad parts. So this morning, we walked from my apartment to brunch at Cafe Charbon. On our way back, holding hands, a man looked at us and said "wow, cute couple." I chuckled to myself and she looked at me and said "next time a guy says that to us, I want you to look him in the eye, smile, and say "we're just fucking." Heh.

2) I told her that I was going to write my experiences into a TV show, and she asked that our encounter be an episode.

3) We showered together this morning, and I'm not quite sure what happened, but after... a prodigous amount of stimulation in the shower - the steam, her dehydration, last night's sex, what have you, she fainted. I'm not sure what to do with that. So I made her get out, tried to walk her back to my bed, and she fainted again. At which point I just hauled off and picked her up and carried her to the bed. She was fine after that - we got her some food and she hasn't fainted since.
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March 5, 2004

I used to have "it".

I used to have "it". Mind you, I've still got it, but man was I on last year.
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I've got a cold from

I've got a cold from hell, delivered to me fully formed by my officemate. Thanks, lady.

The Virgin came over last night to act as nursemaid. I thought her virginity wouldn't be a problem. It's become one for me. She's very sexy - all the right curves and many of the right moves.

But then we started talking about her virginity, which I don't intend to take, and I told her that I was having trouble understanding why she was a virgin - she's sexy (she is) sexual, and hungry for it.

Her deadpan response - "I'm a Christian."

That gave me a case of the heebeejeebies.

I'm an uncommitted Jew. I kick it old-testament school.

So when I proposed a blowjob, she explained that that was something that happened when she got to know and care about someone.

Which was sweet, but not where I'm going with this relationship.

I told her how I'd trained the Jaguar to have orgasms when I kissed her, and to get off on giving me oral pleasure. I told her about the episode with the student journalist, where I had her waiting in my bed while I went on a date with the Mermaid. She took it all in stride. I told her that I'm a bad man, and she should be careful, because... well... I'm a bad man. She admitted that she knew that, and was wary, which is good. I'm not in the business of playing to hurt anyone.

When she gave me a handjob, late in the evening, and I came on her breasts (which are much larger up close than they'd seemed in her clothing) she looked up at me and said, without any sarcasm, that somehow when I came on her, it was really sexy. She bet that I could make a woman orgasm just from a kiss. I smiled at her and nodded knowingly. And soon after, dozed off to sleep.
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March 4, 2004

Email from the Documentarian: >

Email from the Documentarian:

> i think making out with interesting people is what everyone should be
> doing in their spare time.  that or taking pictures.  sometimes taking
> pictures leads to making out, so it's good all around.  we should talk
> or hang out sometime.

Email from Bad Man in response:
Sounds good. Or maybe we should take pictures of making out sometime.


Email back from the documentarian:
nice suggestion-- bold, but nice.  i have a tripod, and several types of cameras.

March 3, 2004

In an instant message debrief

In an instant message debrief with SouthernBelle, I was flirting with her when she came out with "I kept thinking oh god don't let him go for my ears." Apparently, if I'd just nibbled her ears a bit, rather than kissing her, she'd've come upstairs and been putty in my hands.

Interesting.

So tomorrow night the Virgin is likely to come over and act as nursemaid to me, since I'm feeling under the weather and sick.
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